
Where, oh where has my little horn gone...? © 2011 Twolipps, Izel Plants
I was pretty excited when I bought a cow skull at a yard sale last spring. I had wanted one ever since going on vacation to West Texas. My inspriation? This garden wall at the historic Gage Hotel in Marathon, about 70 miles outside of Big Bend National Park.
However, my long suffering husband, thought that hanging a cow skull in our house was rather gruesome. While we were on vacation, I lobbied long and hard with him, arguing it would add some fun to our interior decor. We have cranberry-red walls in our dining room- how awesome would this bleached white skull have looked in there! I think Husband’s response went something to the effect of “ok, I get the whole know-where-your food-comes-from movement, but staring at that thing while eating my flank steak is ridiculous”. Well, gentle reader I was stymied, because these skulls are pretty darn $$ and if I couldn’t hang it inside, I couldn’t see paying top dollar just to be able to hang a cow skull in my backyard.
The following spring, while out walking my dog, guess what I found at a yard sale… They wanted $10 for the cow skull, I had $7.35 in my pocket; we made a deal. Knowing this skull wouldn’t be welcome in my abode, I hung it above my husband’s grill. (Yeah, I’ve been told I’ve got a wicked sense of humor.) I christened it ‘Suzie Longhorn’.

'Suzie Longhorn', the cow skull I hung over my husband's grill. © 2010 Twolipps, Izel Plants
In my defense, I thought it made a clever ‘dust to dust’ tableau. As it turns out, the squirels are having the last laugh. By July, they had whittled down Suzie’s horns to this sad state of affairs.

July 2010: notice how whittled the horns have become. © 2010 Twolipps, Izel Plants
Now in January 2011, Suzie’s only got one horn left for crying out loud! Despite all the insults my dog howled at the squirrels from ground level! Despite the tabasco sauce I sprinkled on her regularly!

Janurary 2011: 'Suzie Longhorn' has become 'Suzie Singlehorn'! © 2011 Twolipps, Izel Plants
Via google, I’ve learned that I am not alone in having a resident bone gnawing squirel. Many people observe that squirels will chew on the hardest parts of the bones, leaving the spongy parts alone. Conventional wisdom speculates this is because, like all rodents, they need to constantly gnaw or risk having their teeth become overgrown (preventing them from eating). Perhaps by spring she will be known as “Suzie Zerohorn’… ;(


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